Sunday, November 13, 2005

I Heart Bots!

Myspace, a great place to discover cool music. But how about skanks?! How about skanks who love cool music?! How about skanks who love cool music and animals?! Hell yes! I love the internet, but especially when some little piece of heaven falls into your lap. This is what America is all about people! Here's what pooped into my inbox tonight while innocently listening to a little Electroclash on Myspace. In the span of only 2 minutes! Bots are common these days, just never are they this attractive...or stupid. I just had to reply!
!
From: Tanya
Date: Nov 13, 2005 6:20 PM
Subject: Whats Happenin
Body:
Whats up, I am Tanya, just thought I would say Hi, liked your profile and all that good stuff lol. Do anything fun this weekend? I am just hangin out, actually drinkin a bit, roomates are out of town, kinda bored lol. Do you drink much? Like to party? Care for Animals??? I work for a vet so I gotta ask haha. Anyways, lets chat more if you have time. I got my webcam on, go to my profile to get to it, lets chat it up, maybe have a drink, and see where it goes :) TANYA
!
From: Betamike
Date: Nov 13, 2005 6:22 PM
Subject: RE: Whats Happenin
Body:
Wow! What a great email, do you talk like you type? It sounds like you are talking 100 miles a minute. I see that you are from Beverly Hills, I sure wish I could come over and meet you but you are kinda far away from me. I live in like...Florida. Do you know where that is? I'm a little bored too, so that is cool. To answer your questions, no I don't drink much or party a whole lot. I DO care for animals, I am sorry your Vet makes you ask that question. He's a meanie hehehehe. you sound very nice, I would love to chat more. thank goodness this is the internet and I don't have to call you, it would be kinda expensive. Oh wait, you have a webcam? wow. Well, I would love to see where this goes but again, you are kind of far away. Okay, take care!

From: Summer
Nov 13, 2005 6:23 PM
Subject: will you be my first? lol
Body:
Well you are officially my first 'friend request' lol, I am trying to figure out how to add someone, I found you in the profile browse thingy and liked your profile, we seem to have quite a bit in common and you know you are hot :) I thought I would see if you could add me as a friend, I am kinda just out on the prowl, haven't done much lately, I am going to be staying with a friend who lives close to you so I thought maybe I could meet some people so I can have something to do while I am there. She is cool but I can't be around here every second of the day or I would go nuts hahah. Well Hope you are having a great weekend, sucks its almost over lol. If you are still on your computer, i have my webcam turned on, you can get to it from my profile. Hope to talk to you then! Summer

!
From: Betamike
Date: Nov 13, 2005 6:24 PM
Subject: RE: will you be my first? lol
Body:
Hi Summer, this must be my night! Two hot girls (one from each coast) wanting to chat me up. I am so excited to be your first! WOW! I thought you meant something else at first. I bet you say that to all the guys lol. No seriously, I think you might be a little easy. It is amazing that you found me right off out of all the thousands of jocks and frat guys on here, amazing! I didn't know that I would have that much in common with someone so attractive. You like miniaturized Japanese food items as well? That's sauce! YOU THINK I'M HOT?! Oh my God! I thought Myspace was a great place to share great music. I never realized people used it to hook up...this is great!!! Yeah, when you move down here screw that roommate and let's hook up and RIOT!!! I'm into all kinds of stuff like hanging out under overpasses and squeezing all the loaves of bread at the grocery store before anyone notices. You'll never want to leave here! I can't wait!!! Thanks for writing to me and thanks for adding me as your friend! You have a webcam too. Interesting. That must be pre-requisite with sexy girls.
!
From: Betamike
Date: Nov 13, 2005 6:36 PM
Subject: RE: RE: will you be my first? lol
Body:
Summer, you still haven't added me as your friend. What gives?! I thought we had something going? Are you there? Hello? Was the bread thing too much? I like animals....

4 comments:

Unknown said...

That was nothing short of a mother humpin' scream.

Thanks for the laughs, betamike!

ykdwptfd: YaKeD in the Water Park's Toilet, due to the crappy FooD. Sorry...that's all I could come up with for that one.

Anonymous said...

omgosh! i read this at work, while my client was taking a test, and i was shaking trying to contain my laughter. this was fricking hilarious.

thank you so much for blogging on these skanks.

a w e s o m e !

Anonymous said...

Betamike...excuse me while I run to the bathroom...I'm going to pee myself! HILARIOUS.

Anonymous said...

annals of a myspace racist