Kwik-E-Mart Consumes Orlando

Please to be getting your gas at Kwik-E-Mart. Florida heat is incredibly intense, our completely natural roof is made from 100% mozzarella cheese and licorice. But please, pay before pumping.

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Our shop sells the finest wares. Do not be fooled by the appearance of the no parking in this photo as we have ample spaces at both the hotel, church of heathen gods and premium ditch locations available for when it rains...doubles as a car wash!

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Thank you for loitering. Please come again. Also, we are fond of saying that we will begrudgingly refund your money on any items that are not half eaten.
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Delicious Krusty O's are more than a way to start your day, you may also end it abruptly.
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Buzz Cola will get you buzzing. Please do not buzz around our clean restrooms. Your mother does not work here for the love of Ganesh.
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We only sell the finest Squishee flavors, mostly tan, green and chunky.
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24 hour security at most stores. As long as the shelves are stocked with our fine baked products.
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Oh. Time to order more Krusty O's. In the meantime, please imagine a fully stocked shelf of Frosted Krusty O's, All Bran Krusty Nuts and Magical Cran Board Dusty Rings.
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Please do not eat any food items while in Kwik-E-Mart. Please to be thanking you very much.
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Please advise what the sign says. Our premium products are worth an investment of your time and colon.
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