Backstage with V-hat @ Coachella

Things overheard while hanging with V-hat in their VIP area at Coachella:

I love Chick-fil-A!
Scorpions!!!
I'm Daniel
That's sauce!
You must protect your child bearing hips
You have tender loins
Loosen up your balloon knot!
Dude, Mike plays a mean air Oboe!
What would happen if the living dead attacked us right now?!
Vagina Hat, that's hot.